5/27/04

More To Do Than Can Ever Be Done

Sometimes I still want to type or write the year starting with a 19. It solidifies the surreal and pensive thoughts I've had of late about life and living it.

From the day we arrive on the planet, we are moving closer to leaving. Life is short. What a cliché, but yet I want to live like I actually believe that now.

The first thing I'm going to do is give up TV. I have come to the conclusion that there is nothing to gain from a mindless TV show, be it a sitcom or a reality show.

Come over to my house and I'll show you reality. Why oh why would I waste one of my precious hours watching a made up show. I can never get my hour back.

I can see certain people laughing right now with their "Oh-sure-you-have-tried-this-before-attitude". But this is something I HAVE to do. I have been complacently watching TV and tricking myself into thinking this was a form of relaxation.

There are stories to tell and books to write. There are legacies to leave. There are girlfriends to stay in touch with. There are books to read and orchestras to listen to. There are pictures to take and scrapbooks to compile. There are sunsets to catch and sunrises to beat. There are walks to take and vacations to plan. There are bicycles to ride, games to play, and gardens to plant. There are porches to sit on and wines to taste. There are recipes to try and relatives to visit. There are children to pray for and talks to have.

There's no turning back.

Here I go.

5/23/04

The Party Is Here

There is no such thing in anyone's life as an unimportant day." ~ Alexander Woollcott

The kids are home. And thus their friends are over. And why not a few of their friend's friends, also? Heck, if you see lights on and a few cars in the driveway, just stop by. We could probably make the Guinness world record tonight for the number of people jammed on a sectional.

Our kid's friends are getting married. It was a lovely wedding reception, and the weather held until about the last 15 minutes. Everyone will go their separate ways on Monday.

Ben and Jennifer will head up north to camp. I am now officially starting a new job. Mark is still being toyed with at work....last week he ran a different route each day, some he knew, some he didn't.

 Melissa will reluctantly finish up the school year sans her senior friends. The doctor ordered one more test for after school is out to make sure she doesn't have kidney damage.

I have a presentation to put together tonight and a pile of bills and mail to go through.

There will come a day when I will welcome the calm and quiet of an empty nest, but that day is not here yet.

5/18/04

No One Else On Earth

When I reach the place I'm going, I will surely know my way
And I will turn and look inside me, and bid farewell to one more day
Every life begins in darkness; every flower was once a seed
And with the sun and wind to test us, we are bound to be released
I will fly beyond this valley, I will open up the gates
And when I reach the place I'm going, I will surely know my way.

I will attend my first "Summer Celebration" concert on June 24, 2004.

Wynonna replaces Willie!

Melissa and I are so there. We will make signs that say something catchy like: I'm a little bit country and so is my 17-year-old daughter. Or, Ashley & Naomi who? Maybe something to announce to the world......... Mom 48, Daughter 17, American Idol = Wynonna!

Do they have fireworks the first night? They should.

Finally, a great reason to go downtown!

5/17/04

The Great Lake

"The worst bankrupt in the world is the person who has lost his enthusiasm." ~ H.W. Arnold

It was like an omen. I decided to go down to Pere Marquette tonight and catch a sunset...it's time to start on my New Year's resolutions. The sunset wasn't that illustrious but I got to watch the Paul S. Friggin Huge Townsend barge pull into the channel.

This is a great lake. It calls to me.

Lighthouses.

Flags staking their claim, stating their cause, and blowing in the wind. Waves lapping the shore. Wet sand. Dry sand. Smooth unadulterated sand. A hazy horizon. Constant noise that doesn't bug me. Jagged rocks.  These are a few of my favorite things.

As I round the curve and the lake that could just as easily be an ocean comes into view it never fails to calm me.

The Muslims get called to prayer 5 times a day. In the Old Testament Daniel prayed 3 times a day in his front window, even though prayer to anyone but King Nebuchadnezzar had been banned.

I will use the sunset and the lake as my Mecca. So if you're reading this---know that you are in my thoughts and prayers. Now I must drive home past the Frosty Oasis...so much for New Year's resolutions.

5/16/04

Start A Love Train

These are the moments I thank God I'm alive
These are the moments I'll remember all my life
I found all I've waited for
And I could not ask for more
These are the moments I know heaven must exist
These are the moments I know all I need is this
I have all I waited for
And I could not ask for more
Every prayer has been answered
Every dream has come true
And right here in this moment
Is where I'm meant to be    
  ***********
Whew! What a week. It has definitely had its highs and lows. Melissa has been battling a kidney infection (we hope) since last Sunday. Blood work, doctor's offices, labs, reports, and medicine have seemed to curtail it somewhat. We are trying to retrain her in the areas of sleeping, drinking, and eating her way to a healthier lifestyle. Slow progress.

I entertained relatives since Thursday, not quite sure if entertainment is the best word to describe it.

The Pop shows were amazing. The best one I have seen in a while. Good job kids. I could have listened to you sing and watched you dance for days.

I wish nothing but love, laughter, success, friendships and faith to all you senior friends of Melissa. And I expect nothing less than greatness to follow you down life's pathways. Let the music play on!

I am so blessed to have family in my life that takes the time and effort to come and lay their accolades on us, undeserving as we are.

To the countless friends who complimented me on Melissa's voice; your praise and adoration was sincere and effortless. You all amaze me and you know who you are! I could not ask for more.

5/9/04

Girls And Gorillas Night Out

The future belongs to those who believe in the beauty of their dreams~ Eleanor Roosevelt

What started as a pea size scheme in Melissa's dream of proving to the world that no one should take the jr. prom too seriously, turned into a full-fledged gorilla costume. I thought she would take a digital picture to actually prove to the naysayers; mission accomplished. I guess she opted for the professional photograph, which, as soon as it gets delivered, you can bet it will be posted here.

I don't know where I got her.

5/6/04

I'm OK

An apology is the super glue of life. It can repair just about anything. ~ Lyn Johnston

I am sorry I haven't been around lately...I didn't know that many people cared. But I'm back and here's a taste of upcoming attractions.

I have figured out the female mathematical equation for growing older. And you thought I couldn't do story problems. 1 hot flash = 1/2 inch around the waist. Trust me it's true.

I have been keeping up my journal; I just don't have time to post it yet. Stay tuned. The minute I decided to start my own business and actually show up for work...I had to call in sick for 3 days. It's probably some kind of stupid menopausal flu, because I felt sick to my stomach and soul. Never had that before.

Soon I will tell you about our 3-day trip to Chicago.

All kinds of Melissa stuff: auditions ACT, NHS, prom dress shopping (it went really well this time), and then helping the other two wrap up their apartment subletting and getting ready for their summer adventures at Springhill.

In the meantime I still have not whipped this house into shape. You'd think, being as small as it is, that I could do that in just a few short hours. All this while listening to more trees being felled in the back and wondering what it will be like to have neighbors. The Red Wings blew it but it still hurts.

Sick to my soul, but I will get better.